Postpartum and Partnerships: The Season Nobody Prepares You For

Nobody tells you what it does to your relationship

Everyone talks about the baby. The sleep deprivation. The feeding challenges. The learning curve of new parenthood.

Nobody talks about what it does to the two people who used to be a couple and are now also parents trying to figure out how to be both things at once.

What the postpartum period actually looks like for couples

Exhaustion that makes everything harder including connection. The division of labor that either happens by choice or by default and then becomes a source of resentment. One partner feeling invisible. The other feeling incompetent. Both feeling overwhelmed and neither saying it clearly enough to actually get support.

Sex that disappears. Not because you do not love each other but because one or both of you is touched out, hormonally different, physically recovering, or just too tired to care. And then the silence around that absence that starts to mean something it does not have to mean.

Postpartum depression and anxiety that go unnamed because everyone is so focused on the baby and because the person struggling feels like they should be grateful rather than struggling.

What helps

Naming what is actually happening. In the relationship and individually. Getting support before the distance becomes the default.

Couples therapy during the postpartum period is not a sign that your relationship is failing. It is a smart move for two people going through one of the most significant transitions of their lives who want to come out of it still connected.

Immediate openings for couples counseling and individual therapy in Layton, UT and telehealth throughout Utah. To get started, call 801-525-4645 and request Candace Lance. You can also view and my profile on Psychology Today or on Therapy Den.